Every line is a cliché, the plot a nonsensical string…

…but fuck the common critic with his or her platonic ideal, blockbusters living or dying (hard) by binaries such as, “Is there enough character development?”

Die Hard 5 isn’t a good film – more damningly the aesthetic is pretty much point-and-shoot-and-shake – but it is every bit as legitimate as any other piece of popular pacification.